I’m doing something a little different this week.... because.
Some weeks are shit-shows.
This week I was meant to be posting my next chapter from my next book Unburdened... all about the practical overwhelm women face. (How ironic then that I am too overwhelmed!)
Life has a funny habit of slapping your smug organised face with a wet fish once in a while.
On Monday my laptop broke. Like totally, unusable.
My business runs from my laptop. Not the occasional email here and notes there. Every aspect of my business - emails, accounts, writing, coaching, speaking presentations - all of it.
And this week I had International Women’s Day talks to prep slides and notes for, I had all the planning for my (un)retreat Soul & Spice to Marrakech next week to do, I had coaching sessions and writing to do.
On top of that.... the passport office emailed to say they needed my birth cert to renew my passport which I applied for two weeks ago. In the mayhem of my house at the moment, packed with weeks of clearing our my parent’s house, can I find my birth certificate? Fuck, no.
So I’ve had a passport drama which is indeed a drama considering I’m taking a bunch of women to Marrakech next weekend and really have to be on that flight!
And then the boiler went on the blink.
So…..to recap (and it’s only Wednesday)…. No laptop. No passport. No heating.
That’s on top of all the normal pressures... getting people fed, walking the frisky puppy, coaching (on my phone), giving talks, and breathing.
Shitshow.
So here is what I’m offering you today for my weekly column, and hopefully normal service will resume next week.
It’s when the shit hits the fan that I really have to walk my talk.
I talk all the time about the 3 superpowers of living well and ageing powerfully - curiosity, intention and self-support.
And I’ve had to really dig into that these last few days. So I’m going to give you a few tips for keeping your head when life really is pushing you to losing it.
1. Curiosity.
There is always a solution. As I reminded a client this week - when you feel the stress rising, ask yourself - is this an emergency or a problem to solve?
My passport and missing birth cert is an emergency... but it’s also a problem to solve. And I can’t solve it in emergency mode.
Admittedly, the solution requires me to order a new Birth cert, travel up to Belfast to collect it, come straight back down and go for an emergency passport appointment and hope to the goddesses of goodness I can collect it in time.
2. Intention.
When my emotional bandwidth is fried, everything feels 10 x worse. My goal this year has been emotional ease. That doesn’t mean not caring or not feeling. It means protecting my emotional bandwidth at all costs. With intention. I literally cannot afford to let this all drama wipe me out. So I’m choosing to focus, do what needs to be done, and do one thing at a time. As I said to a client this week - it’s not a To-Do list, it’s a Keeping-Doing list... you’ll never get to the end of it. So weave your needs through it, not hold them off until you get to the end. Because you are not getting to the end. Ever.
3. Self - support.
This is not false positivity or whacky wellness. This is practical, ever-changing investment in your emotional wellbeing. As I always say - when life feels hard it’s usually because it is hard.. now ask yourself what I can I do to support myself through it? This is such an important habit... because, for me, this week’s drama is passport. This week’s annoyance is laptop. This week’s task is fix the boiler. But next week there will be more. Always, always more. So learning to support yourself through the dramas, and emotions and issues and frustrations... allows you to navigate life with just a tinge more ease. For example, amid all this shit-storm I really enjoyed the dawn as I walked my puppy this morning. I don’t want to miss things like that because my head is bent in stress. I’ve missed so much of my life in that state.
I spoke to a client today about the transition she is in... she has spent her life protecting her family, her business, her home.. but now it is time to protect herself. (She has to see herself as a superhero with a protective shield around herself - lycra and cape, optional). From all their drama, all their hijacking of her emotions. She’s had enough - and they need to stand on their own two feet.
So that’s it. My emergency broadcast frmm the emergencies of this week.
I’ll get the passport by the skin of my teeth. I’m borrowing my daughters’s laptop between her college assignments and my other daughter’s ipad between hers. My new one is coming next week. And I fixed the heating. For now.
All will be well.... and the goal for me is to be well through it all.
How can you protect your emotional bandwidth this week?
As always, I’d love to hear from you…
And if you want to really dig deep into practical ways to manage some of the mayhem… how about a little Spring Clean of your life. I’m running a live session on 1st April to help you:
✨ Declutter the beliefs that keep you carrying too much
✨ Dust away habits that are draining your energy
✨ Refresh your sense of direction for the next chapter
No hoover required.
Just clearer thinking, lighter shoulders and a chance to start mattering more in your own midlife again.
You can register here for just €49 and my paid subscribers will get a 20% discount… just message me and I’ll send you the code.
https://www.alanakirk.com/spring-clean-your-life
